MY HANDS

"My hands are small I know, but they're not yours - they are my own..." "And we are never broken... in the end, only kindness matters..." - these are some of the lyrics from Jewel's song "Hands". Watch the video here >

I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister-in-law, and an aunt. I am a Doula - which means I support those in pregnancy throughout their journey. I am a facilitator of Mental Health Recovery and Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP - http://mentalhealthrecovery.com/wrap-is/ ). I attend 12-Step Meetings - I have a sponsor and I am a sponsor. I am always adding to my calendar with workshops and events that promote healing for me and teach me how to share this with others. It is through my own recovery journey that I find the strength and grace to be present with others.

Over three and a half years ago, I was desperate to be loved. I didn't know how to feel love or share love anymore. My world was dark. At times I begged for escape from my life and relationships. At one point, I tried to end it all. But I still had that very shiny bright light of hope, albeit small, it was enough to get me up and out of that dark tunnel. I lost parts of my hands that day and am now considered an amputee. I still have pain in my hands but I have developed their abilities and now I don't consider myself disabled - just differently abled. Like Jewel sings, "...we are never broken..."! Everything I go through brings me closer to the highest good.

I went through a ton of therapy, both individual and group programs. In this therapy, I learned to deal with my very intense emotions by validating them and accepting things as they are. I also acquired a gentle, calm, and calming Service Dog. Now, I am in therapy to explore some of my past traumas. One of these issues is my own past pregnancy history. I start here, so that my work with you is not tainted by my own issues. As I begin, I recognize that I still want for more pregnancy and childbirth and children in my own life but whether or not that is actually going to happen is still up in the air. What I do know, now, is a sense of being deeply rooted and held (grounded). I am grateful for this therapy.

I have divided my year so that I have more balance - part of it devoted to my own healing, and part of it devoted to yours. This feels right and good and fair. I am always open to questions. May you feel safe here in this space I have created for us to relax and learn in! Your body knows the way, in your right mind (baby-brain) you are aware of exactly what you need from us. Let this intuition guide us. Let us not hesitate to take care of ALL of our needs - emotional, spiritual, physical - even when that means delegating someone else to help. We are an interdependant society - how many times have you heard that? Do we actually listen to it and apply it? You can lean on me.